I just had a beautiful breakfast: French Toast with large amounts of Nutella, banana and Mexican coffee ( which basically is hot milk, instant coffee and sugar). Chocolate has been linked to serotonin levels in the brain... no wonder I have had the same breakfast for almost a week now. It makes me feel better... I think.
I've been acting like a crazy lunatic for the past weeks and finally decided that I need to see my therapist. I feel such a lame-o!!! I really don't want to cry or feel sorry for myself but sometimes I just can't help it. Moving from the Upper East Side (where I shared a place with Him, my ex) to Astoria, with two other roommates, has been a little traumatic!! Please don't get me wrong; I'm not snobbish in anyway, and Astoria turned out to be a good location, but going from my sky high, super modern, two bedroom, big closet spaces, elevator, doorman type of apartment, to my basement (literally!), no closet! and well... the roaches (that I discover after moving in) that say hello to me instead of a lovely doorman, have not made the transition any easier... In fact I just went to the bathroom and kill one... and poured a ton of Boric powder everywhere! I am now living the real New York life...
Hey C--
ReplyDeleteI think its' great that you are blogging. It's brave. Break-ups are the worst because you have to adjust to someone's absence. There is a large hole to fill. There are constant comparisons to what once was. In the beginning it is the worst. But through your journey as you begin to understand yourself once again you will find strength. One day your struggles will be behind you and you will understand that they were necessary in making you a better person. Struggle is like a giant weight. Lifting it can make you feel exhausted. But over time the weight seems less heavy...you are getting stronger. You need strength to prepare you for opportunities that come your way. Otherwise you won't be ready for them. Ups and downs. The dynamics of life.
Thank you... words like these keep me going.
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